theres a strange dichotomy between the way the culture hawaii accepts and repels its guests. on the one hand people here are warm and open and friendly and there is a strong sense of family connection that holds people together, but then there is also a strong sense of resentment for white people that stems from the huge amount of poverty that exists throughout the islands. lack of education plays a large role here too and as with any situation the easy way to try and find the answer to a tough problem is to identify a scapegoat and focus your anger and frustration toward it.
personally i went from being called ohana by a new found cousin of mine to having a knife pulled on me at waikiki beach so i had the joy of experiencing the full spectrum first hand. of all my travels ive never felt worse about being white than i did here.
scenically speaking hawaii is as beautiful as i remember it. pristine beaches, lush forests and generally very clean cities and the smell of tropical flowers everywhere gives a surreal feeling that i’ve not felt anywhere else. i love it here but i think if i was to do it again id have to have some local people my age to show me around.
seeing doug and the other cousins was really good because it gave me a chance to put a more human feeling with these names that until now had only existed in my distant memory. i wonder if everyone has as detached of a adolescent life as i had. i dont feel like i was even in the same body. like everything that happened before i was 20 was just a bunch of implanted memories. yes i believe im actually living in the matrix. which was that pill you were supposed to take? the red or the blue?
there isnt enough hours to sleep as long as id like to lately. my life is so easy and im so tired. i’ll make sense of it all eventually.
No comments:
Post a Comment