Some time ago I saw the Sergeant Major of the Army speak when he was visiting Fort Bragg. He's the top enlisted soldier in the Army and gets paid somewhere around what a Lt. Colonel makes. A man who is responsible for hundreds of thousands of soldiers makes the same as a man responsible for about five hundred, interesting. Anyway, he opened his talk with a reminder that we should all feel very special that we joined because less that 1% of America is currently serving in the military. I thought that was an odd scale from which to judge ones own worth. Less than 1% of America feels that date rape is an acceptable practice, way to go guys, you're the elite.
Another standard pep talk for a paratrooper takes in to account that we not only volunteered for the Army but also to become airborne qualified. We are two time volunteers. We answer the call. Well if that's our benchmark I would like to say that I'm a four time volunteer, once for the Army, once for airborne, once for Ranger regiment, and once for the 82nd All American Chorus, so I'm a four time volunteer, one time quitter, and a one time, hey dirt bag stop being a pussy and go to Iraq to actually do your job. Staff Sergeant promotion board here I come.
It probably isn't surprising that recruiting numbers are at record highs right now. A terrible economy, decreased in violence in Iraq, I can just hear the gears turning in the recruiting offices. "Look son, I can almost guarantee you won't end up in Iraq, just sign here... thanks." "Oh, and by the way you said you enjoyed hiking, right? Great! You'll do just fine in Afghanistan. Sucker!" If you join the Army for school or to pay off debts and you don't want to deploy, you are dumb. End of story.
Somebody once told me that the Army is really no different than most jobs, no matter where you work and you're always somebody's bitch. But I can't recall a single time where my manager at Mile Hi Valet ever told me I was a worthless sack of shit and to do push ups until couldn't hold up the weight of my body. Nope, not once. The Army also has this singularly fascinating practice of taking the people who get fired for incompetence and placing them in jobs that are better than the one they got fired from! Part of me wants to stay in for the NCO's and officers that despite the long ours and poor compensation, find the courage and perseverance within themselves to fight the daily up hill battle against the deluge of lethargic and short sighted bureaucracy that is this modern Army but they are just drops of water in a choked green river. I see no cure for the pollution, just small glimmers of hope, treading just above the surface against the tug of the current. Like little angry turtles poking their heads up between lily pads, lily pads that never went to college.
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It's just a matter of time before the machines rebel. I'm pretty sure that my Mac is already self aware. It shows remarkable human like characteristics such as a lack of motivation to work properly and it files things away that it thinks will be useful later and then loses them. The minute it asks me if I think about the new generation of Mac books while I'm typing on it, I'm taking it out back and beating it with a shovel.
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There are three types of people in this world, leaders, followers, and unicorns. The leaders of course are all pro-active and crap so they have taken gather up all the unicorns and keep them locked away so that no one ever gets to see them. This is of course why followers think there are only two kinds of people in the world.
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